Sunday, October 2, 2011

The Wedding and The New House

Before we were married, we had a little apartment on top of a garage in the rear lot of some houses that sat on the main street.  After we were engaged, one day we went down to Mission Valley to pick out our wedding rings and get them sized.  Jack and I both picked out gold wedding bands with 3 diamonds, and a silver strip above and below the 3 diamonds.  We had them sent off to be sized for us, and would pick them up later when they would be returned to the store.  Jack also decided we'd need a house for the family we planned to have.  So he found out that the people that lived in one of the houses out front were moving and he asked for the name of their landlord and we went to pay him a visit.  He rented the house to us, and when the other people moved out, we went to check out the inside.  The living room was really long and rather narrow.  There were 2 bedrooms with a bathroom between them which you could enter from either side.  The bathroom only had a shower, but at the time the price was right and we decided we liked it.  The kitchen was small and had a small dining room just off the kitchen that had been added on at a later time.  We had a small yard out front and a smaller yard in the back where I could hang clothes to dry. 

One evening after we had the keys, we went down to Ceasars in Mission Valley and bought our dinner,.  We took it back to the house and celebrated our new surroundings.  We hadn't moved furniture in yet and we sat on the floor and ate spaghetti, raveoli, garlic bread and salad.   No matter what we did together, we had a great time.  The little house also had french doors in the living room on either side of the main door,  The windows were rather high, but after we hung the drapes it was just fine.  Of course I was in seventh heaven and any house would have been fine with me.  As long as I was with Jack, I didn't care about anything else.  So, the next day, we began moving our things from the little apartment, down to the house.  Jack's Mom, Kay, came over and helped us move.  We didn't have a lot of furniture, so the move didn't take very long.  Some neighbors that lived by my Mom's house gave us 2 small orange leather couches on black frames so we at least had a couch.  We had a lamp that hung from the ceiling which I called our Camelot lamp.  We got our drapes from my Grandma Elsie who didn't need them any more and we had some dishes between us that seved their purpose.  We had a bed for our room, but nothing for the other bedroom.  We used the extra room for boxes full of things from the apartment.  Once we were settled in, we began to plan our wedding. 

After our rings came in, I couldn't leave the box they came in alone.  Every day I would go to the chest and open the box and look at the rings.  One afternoon we went shopping to buy a dress for me for the wedding.  I had few friends, and my family didn't really lend any support, so Jack paid for my dress.  We hit it on the first try.  The floor length dress was a soft sky blue with a dark blue velvet jacket that tied in the front and had a rose attached.  I tried it on and came out of the dressing room to show Jack.  He loved it and so did I!  We went home and just enjoyed the rest of the day.  We went to see  his  
Mom and Grandmother.  I remember visiting them and Kay brought out some of her earrings that she thought would be nice with the dress.  She was excited and anxious to please.  I picked out a pair that matched the dress the most and they had little pink roses on a turquoise stone.  They were on little gold wires and I loved them.  After we visited for a while, we went driving and wound our way home.

Jack and I went to one of the Hobby shops in the area and he picked out decorations for our wedding cake.  He made the topper himself, with angels, and pillars and swans.  It was absolutely beautiful.  My Mom wanted us to get married at her house, and even though Jack wasn't thrilled with that, we decided we would.  Mom said she wanted to buy the cake and make the food.  The strangest thing happened with the cake.  She hadn't seen the topper, but when we saw the cake, it was decorated exactly the same as the wedding topper! 

I made an appointment with a pastor at the Methodist Church, where I was Baptized, to make arrangement for him to perform our wedding ceremony.  His name was Reverend Ulrickson, a very nice person, and he talked a little with us and said he would be glad to do the ceremony.  He went over what we would do as he performed the wedding, and at one point we were supposed to kneel to receive the blessing.  We forgot to do that, but he blessed us standing and that's what we would do in our lives together.  Stand together and face the world.  We had no idea of the trials and tribulations we would face, but we had a strong connection to each other, and we were determined to stand together through it all.

No one gave us a wedding shower, so we had very little in the way of material things we would need to start our lives together.  We pretty much were on our own and we were ok with that.  Neither one of us had been supported much in our decision to marry and I had no really close friends that would have given us a shower.  I really didn't even think about it.  It really meant more for us to purchase our own things, and our budget was pretty tight.  The Nova took a lot of gas, and we still had bills to pay, so we were resigned to having things tight for a while.  As the time ticked away, the wedding day was getting closer to being real.  The people at work had tried to dissuade Jack from being involved with me.  One of the supervisrs took Jack into the coffee room one day and told him he shouldn't get involved with me.  He told him I had a lot of problems, and Jack just told him,  "yeah I know.  She told me."  And I had.  I told Jack early on that I was Schizophrenic, but he didn't believe me.  He loved me and could see no fault in me.  Much to their distaste, we were very happy and had great fun together.  Jack wrote a poem for me about a pink rose in a field of sourgrass, and that was about the size of it.  There had been one woman working with me before Jack came to work there and she always told me no one would want to marry me because I was too fat.  I had bought a tee shirt that had a little hippie on the back that was in a mini-skirt and rather chubby, and beneath the hippie was a caption that said, "Thin might be in, but fat's where its at!"  and as she sat right behind me, I wore it as often as possible!  We ignored all of them and had a ball together.  Linda was happy for me, but the rest of them just turned up their noses at us and shook their heads in disgust.  We found that most insecure people were like that around us.  What we had was real and it has just gotten stronger with every passing year.  We are still happy together and have seen 35 married years together, with 3 children, and now 7 grand-children.  I guess true love can outlast anything.  Ours sure has.

Finally, the day arrived to get ready for our wedding and make the trip to my Mom's house.  The only ones that would be there were family members, and we had asked Jack's sister Helen Marie to be my bridesmaid, and my brother David to be Jacks best man.  They both had agreed.  I woke up first and went to do my makeup and hair, while Jack made us some coffee, and began getting ready himself.  I put my hair up in curls on top of my head and put a strip of baby's breath in front of the curls.  I did my makeup, and before we left the house the mail came and in it was one of my Cosmetique selections.  In it was a new perfume called Laughter and that's what I wore for fragrance.  I already had white lace heels, and I put on the dress and tied the jacket just below the rose.  We had gone to the store the night before and I had bought baby roses in pink and white and ribbon to tie them together with.  I made a boquet for Helen and myself.  When we were ready, we took a drive to Jack's Mom's house and they were going to take me to my Mom's place.   Jack took the fiat ahead of me to set up the music and give the rings to David to hold.  Jack's Mom, Grandmother and his sisten Helen Marie all went with me and we stopped for gas along the way.  Kay stuck her head out the window and told the attendant that I was marrying her son that day.  The attendant, a woman, made up a large boquet of 2 different colors of blue carnations, wrapped them in blue paper and gave them to me!  I was so surprised.  The colors exactly matched my dress and jacket.  Then we were on our way. 

When we got there, I got out first and the sun was bright, the day was very still and warm and it felt like I was walking in a dream.  I went to the door and rang the bell.  My Mom answered the door, and the look of surprise on her face was worth gold.  She said to me, "I haven't seen you look so pretty since you were in high school!  Who bought you that beautiful dress?"  I told her Jack did, and shortly thereafter everyone was assembled for the wedding.  The Reverend arrived and teased me and Jack and asked us several times if we were sure we wanted to do it.  We just laughed and assured him we did and the music began as we took our places in front of the Christmas tree.   We had decided on Journey to the Center of the Earth sound track for our wedding music.  It was very dramatic and you could sense a greater presence there that day.  It was the most beautiful day of my life, but there would be many more surprises for me and Jack.  Life was coming to us in waves of joy and happiness and  I don't believe there was anyone or anything that could tear us apart.  Many have tried, but we are still one.

After we said our vows and became man and wife, Jack paid the Reverend and then we cut the cake. 
Reverend Ulrickson got a plate of food and cake and sat down by my grandmother to eat.   They were having a great time, and my Dad opened a bottle of champagne and we all had a glass.  He made a toast to us and Jack's sister who was not very sophisticated started snickering and champagne came out her nose I think.  We were to learn later that my Dad's toast was for show.  Before we went back to work I made a trip to take my Grandmothers slip back to her and she told me that as soon as we had left my Dad made the comment that he would "give it a year."  I could have gone forever without hearing that.  Just one of the many people who would try to destroy what we had.  I was hurt and angry when I got back to the house and Jack knew right away that something had happened.  I told him about it and he just hugged me.  He had told me that from the first time he met my family, he didn't think I was really their child.  He thought I had been adopted.  This was a first in the things they would do to us.  I sometimes think that it was a bad dream.  This was my life they were playing games with. 

After the toast had been made, we asked Kay to bring the cake to our place for a small reception later that day, and we left to go to the Naval base to get our checks.  We went in the office and Herb hugged me and shook Jack's hand.  I didn't see Joyce, the woman who said I'd never get married because I was too fat, anywhere.  Later on my friend Linda told me that Joyce had told her she had never seen anyone
atually glow before.  Linda almost cried when I went over to hug her.  After we got our checks, we went Christmas shopping for our families, and then we went home, got out of our wedding clothes, had something to eat and got ready for the reception.  A few of our friends came, including my brother, but no family came except Kay and Helen.  They brought the cake and I was devastated.  Kay told me that David got a fork and ate almost the whole cake.  He had no manners whatsoever and I had only the wedding cake top that was for Jack and I and only a few slices.  We had ice cream and drinks and chips and sandwiches, but the cake was destroyed.  No one from my family even tried to make it a great celebration. 

Later in the evening after everyone had left, Jack and I took sandwiches and a thermos of hot tea and took a drive through "Camelot", (what I called San Diego).  Everything was decorated for Christmas and the whole town seemed to be celebrating with us.  Thus we began our life together as man and wife and the world would unfold for us in spite of the people and events that we would deal with in our lives.  We had 2 weeks off for our honeymoon and we went many places, enjoyed our friends, and just loved being together.  We bought things to do, models, crafts, canvases and paint and we just celebrated every moment.   Life is a beautiful force if you see it with the eyes of understanding.  There was much for me to learn about this wonderful person I married.  And a lifetime to learn it in.  We have shared joy, happiness, and sorrow as well.  We are bonded together as one, as it should be.  The first year would bring a great change to our lives as man and wife.  But I will go into that the next time we meet.  Hope you are enjoying the stories I have put here for you.  I have had a wonderful life, and I want to share the best and the saddest moments with you, my grandchildren, and my 3 children as well.   There is much to know about us, but the most important thing to know is that love is the strongest force in the universe.  And your Grandad and Grandma, will always be as one. 

See you next time,
Love and Kisses,
Grandma

No comments:

Post a Comment